Juneteenth [I read stuff]

Wherein I read things, laugh [or not], and pass them on to you…

General Order Number 3

One of General Granger’s first orders of business was to read to the people of Texas, General Order Number 3 which began most significantly with:

“The people of Texas are informed that in accordance with a Proclamation from the Executive of the United States, all slaves are free. This involves an absolute equality of rights and rights of property between former masters and slaves, and the connection heretofore existing between them becomes that between employer and free laborer.”

• Cat Stole My Pants – funny CCTV of cat stealing items

• Massive Crowd Gathers For Reading Of Vagina Monologues At Michigan Capitol:

After two female legislators were banned from the Michigan House floor last week after saying “vagina” during a debate about an anti-abortion measure, a massive crowd has gathered at the state capitol for a reading of “The Vagina Monologues.” There are an estimated 5,000 people in attendance.
[thinkprogress/Judd Legum/18 Jun 2012]

• Sausage attack: Bicyclist beaten by man swinging sausages:

BROCKTON, MA (AP) – A Massachusetts man is facing charges for allegedly attacking a bicyclist with sausage links and a wrench before making off with jewelry and the bike.

Police say Michael Baker is scheduled to be arraigned Monday on charges including assault and battery with a dangerous weapon in connection with the Sunday morning attack.

According to The Enterprise, the victim told police his assailant at first started swinging a string of sausage links at him before hitting him with a wrench. The victim was hospitalized. Police say Baker was caught a short time later with the bike and a wrench.

Police later found that sausages and other food had been stolen from a food stand at the Brockton Fairgrounds.

[AP/18 Jun 2012]